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United They Stand: Women's Solidarity in the Arab World

Posted by Adrian Avedisian on May 8, 2008 at 15:35:26:

United They Stand: Women's Solidarity in the Arab World
In contrast to the societal freedoms Western women enjoy on a daily basis, Arab women live according to a much stricter societal code. In some cases they may not be able to leave their house without permission or an escort, walk down the street with a man, or simply keep their heads uncovered outside of the home. But there is not such a black and white distinction between Arab women and Western women. Contrary to many Western beliefs, some Arab women refuse to wear a headscarf and do not get in trouble at all. Some actually bathe in the ocean wearing bikinis, which poses no problem to their honor. Western vision toward the Arab world may be quite skewed when it comes to the practices and daily life of Arabs. Personally, I was shocked while reading about Asya in In the Eye of the Sun who openly talked about sex with her nanny. Our Western views may be blurry when it comes to what women can and cannot do versus what they are willing to do.
Regardless of Western views on the Arab world, I am going to write about these Arab women and the unbreakable bonds they form with each other amidst their restrictions and hopes for liberation. Women’s solidarity as I have seen it, is so strong in the Arab world that it is undeniably a practice that will continue forever. Women do not only meet to gossip, but they offer each other tickets to freedom for what just may be a small part of their day. They gather and shed the restrictions society has placed on them. They come together and voice their strong, probably taboo opinions. They convene to support each other and open their minds to the worlds they hope and dream to live in. It is as if the gathering of women in the Arab world is necessary for women to be able to survive. Their sanity and happiness depend on whether they may express themselves if only to the other women in their circles who will listen to them.
Living in a male dominated world is undoubtedly difficult, but with the help, love, support, and sometimes frustration of other women alongside, Arab women find it that much more bearable and worth living in. Some women dream of parading around the streets with no head coverings, as in Dreams of Trespass, but if they cannot do that without being condemned, at least they may parade around their parlors sans head coverings with other women cheering their support. In other cases, some women may experience severe loss or heartbreak due to the constant struggles in the Middle East, as in A Building over the Fakihani and again, are supported and consoled by the many women surrounding them. The unity that runs through each woman’s circle is unbreakable. Each woman contributes and gives part of herself to other women and with that they all experience a sense of solidarity unparalleled in other societies.
Women take up such a significant role in their families and society and are rewarded from it through their women’s solidarity groups. The slight disconnect between a husband and a wife may be unsatisfying to one woman, but her freedom to express that to other women and have them share their feelings with her is a powerful coping technique. The husband-wife dynamic in the Arab world certainly varies, but usually has an underlying similarity of inequality. Women usually accept this, for it is tradition, and deal with the fact that they may not express themselves fully in front of their husbands. In front of their female support groups, they may. On the opposite side of the spectrum, some husbands and wives completely respect each other equally and may talk to each other about anything. Still though, the group of friends a woman has, allows her to express herself differently, or just give her company during the day while her husband is out working.
In each of the five books we read over the course of this semester, women’s solidarity plays an integral role in the shaping of each woman’s life. From book to book each woman experiences solidarity slightly differently, but the underlying unity of female solidarity continues to exist and manifest itself in homes and harems and refugee camps all over the Arab world. In Pillars of Salt Maha and Um Saad stick together in the insane asylum and offer each other comfort and support during their heartbreakingly dreadful stay in the mental hospital. Before her trip to the mental hospital though, Maha was a part of female solidarity in her village and utilized it to the full effect. A different couple of women, Su’ad and Jinan in A Balcony over the Fakihani display similar solidarity to Maha and Um Saad in that they also give each other comfort and entertainment as best friends and supporters in difficult times. Dreams of Trespass showcases the widest scope of women’s solidarity in that the whole harem and the women living in it are dependent on the solidarity they possess. Even though there are two completely different kinds of harems, both exemplify the epitome of what it is to hold such a strong bond between women. The most a-typical instance of women’s solidarity in the set of books shows up in A Woman of Five Seasons where the main character and narrator, Nadia, sadly points out the solidarity between the rich women of Barquis and explains how necessary their bond is to supplement the dissatisfaction in their lives. Nadia herself lacks a substantial female group and is somewhat lost and lonely, until she meets her companion and business partner, Jessica. Lastly, in Ahdaf Soueif’s novel, women’s solidarity is also not a strong notion in the main character, Asya al-Mursi’s life. Yes, Asya continues to stay connected with her best friend Chrissie, but as a Westernized Arab woman, Asya does not depend on the solidarity of other women like the majority of the other women we have read about. One last notion I would like to address is the opposing notion that older women and younger women possess a disconnect in their relationships. I will argue that the reason for such a schism is due to contrasting approaches toward tradition and modernism.
In addition to containing strong solidarity among women, each book is set in and around the modern Middle East. All five books are written by Arab women and take place in Jordan, Lebanon, Morocco, Palestine/Southern Arabia, and Cairo, respectively. Regarding time period, the books also take place around key political movements in the Middle East, for example during the British Mandate of Jordan, or the war between Israel and Egypt, but all written and set in the 20th Century.
One of the strongest bonds I have come across between two women is the bond between Maha and Um Saad in Pillars of Salt. Both women are unnecessarily and unwillingly kept in a mental hospital mainly because the men in their lives could no longer bear to live with each one, and for his own benefit, admitted each woman to a mental hospital to get her out of his life and out of the way. At first meeting the two are not immediately friends. Um Saad, a more “civilized” city-dweller not only wreaks havoc when she first enters her hospital room, but also cruelly insults her soon-to-be best friend and roommate, Maha. Maha, quite opposite of Um Saad, is a tribal Bedouin woman whose dark skin, rough features, and rural lifestyle elicit some form of discrimination from urbanites. Immediately after Um Saad’s tantrum she apologizes to Maha and the two begin the journey of living together for what seems an indefinite amount of time.
After living in the mental hospital for a short time, these two women form a relationship stronger than any other. More than just friends, they are sisters, mother and daughter, partners in crime, and confidants. The author, Fadia Faqir sets up the chapters for Pillars of Salt where each one is narrated by a different character. Um Saad and Maha have their own chapters and are able to tell their own stories, but involve each other heavily in what they have to say. As Um Saad comes upon her turn to tell a story, she always invokes Maha as “Maha sister.” More than a term of endearment, calling another woman “sister” is a telltale sign of true bonding and solidarity. Um Saad considers Maha as a sister because the two spend every waking moment together trapped in this horrible institution, a kind of nightmarish dream. Patiently, Maha listens to the usually heartbreaking stories of Um Saad’s life and offers her all the sympathy she is capable of giving out. The following quote is a prime example of the heartfelt concern these women have for each other when Maha comforts Um Saad after the doctors shave all of her hair off in an effort, Maha says, to control the women in captivity:
I leapt out of bed, pushed her hands away, picked up a pink scarf and then tied it around her head, making sure I covered the bald skull completely. Her black eyes were dull, were turning white…I put her head on my chest and the heat of her tears seeped through my white jacket, my black robe (Faqir 208).
Many people would certainly try to comfort their friend after such a traumatizing incident, but Maha rushes over to Um Saad and makes sure to wrap her head in a scarf. She even places Um Saad’s head on her chest and physically comforts her as a mother would comfort her humiliated and traumatized child. Maha feels profound sympathy for Um Saad, her fellow woman, deceived and tricked by cruel, evil men.
From the beginning to the end of Pillars of Salt, Um Saad and Maha stick together, side by side locked in their mental hospital ward. They not only care for each other, but as two women scorned by their families and shipped away from home, away from their children, they support each other simply by listening to each other’s life stories. To have someone you can really talk to, someone who will listen to your most proud and exhilarating life moments as well as listen to your most devastating ones is a true friend. Maha and Um Saad truly showcase the solidarity between two women.
Within the book, each character narrates her life story to us. Much unlike Um Saad’s sad, unhappy life, Maha’s life is lovely and completely fulfilling, with the exception of her brother Daffash’s part in it. Maha tells us about growing up and living in the Bedouin society, but we mainly learn about her life starting from the time she marries Harb, her loving husband. The relationship between Harb and Maha was one of unconditional love and mutual respect. Together they are a perfect couple, but in battle Harb is killed by the English and we can see the first of many female-mourning scenes. Maha’s pain and grief for the loss of her husband is unbearable, but with the help of her best friend Nasra and to an extent, her mother in law, Aunt Tamam, we see the full impact of how far women will go to console each other. Maha’s best friend and confidant, Nasra, is with her every step of her now difficult life, truly showing what it is to maintain strong female bonds.
We come to understand that Nasra did not originally belong to the tribe, making her attachment to the tribe significantly less than anyone who was born within the tribe. In addition to not having a close tie to the tribe, Nasra is also a little bit slow mentally. We can infer this by the way she speaks slightly backwards, for example, when Maha questions Nasra asking whether Maha’s brother Daffash forced Nasra to have sex with him Nasra replies, “Under my breast, his dagger, I swear (10).” This incident brings up many points I would like to discuss, the first of which I have said already, the bond between Nasra and Maha. Maha watches out for Nasra like a sister, and Nasra adores Maha. Throughout the entire story, each woman spends an exorbitant amount of time looking after the other or just spending quality friend time together. When Maha bears her son Mubarak, it is Nasra who acts as a second mother to him, constantly watching over him and always playing with him. In the previous incidence, Daffash has raped Nasra and Maha feels she must take vengeance on Daffash, not only because she loves Nasra, but she also feels such solidarity between the rest of the women of her tribe, that she must keep Daffash away from them. Maha angrily cries out “I would kill that mule and save the women of Hamia (11),” which she tries to do again when Daffash almost rapes another man’s wife in a cave above the village.
The female solidarity in Maha’s life extends even greater throughout the village of Hamia. The women of Hamia form an unbreakable bond that transcends their ties to their husbands or their traditional roles as subservient, calm women. Because I have already introduced Maha’s corrupted cruel brother Daffash, it need not be a surprise to know that in the middle of the story, Daffash brutally beats Maha for embarrassing him at an English military officer’s party. First, during the beating, Nasra tries to push Daffash off and save her best friend. Obviously her attempts made no difference and Daffash lashes out anyway. The results of Daffash’s wrath came in the form of black and swollen eyes, missing teeth, and most likely cracked, although not broken, bones. After the beating all the women of Hamia come to Maha’s aid by concocting ointments, creams, and elixirs to help heal Maha’s wounds. Maha describes it as thus, “ When I woke up, Hulala was trying to force a piece of bandage into my mouth. The pain of injured flesh started hammering my head…All the women were gazing at me weeping (165).” The women not only bandage Maha and try to heal her wounds, but also weep at the sight of her, at the fact that one of them was beaten so brutally.
On a much more joyous occasion, the women join together to celebrate the end of the war, the war in which Maha’s husband, Harb was killed. Naturally, I would think that the entire village would celebrate such a victorious triumph, but it is only the women who come together and enjoy themselves. The poem or song Fadia Faqir decides to place in the middle of the party invokes women only:
Qasimi women of Hami,
Be happy,happy.
Your enemy has departed.
Be happy, be happy.
Days of fig and olive,
Are coming,coming
It seems only the women are happy at the departure of the enemy, which I think supports the claim that solidarity among the women is stronger than among any other group in the tribe. In the stories following Pillars of Salt we will come again to this same exact practice of women, and women only, coming together to celebrate an occasion.
Unfortunately, the happiness only lasts so long in this story and the instances of women’s solidarity following the previous happy festivities are only poignant. Once Daffash beats Maha, he devises a plan to marry her off to the old and undesirable Sheikh Talib and take the farm, which is her own property. Nasra learns of the secret plan and informs all the women in an effort to save Maha. As a group, the women put their heads together and come up with a creative plan to sneak Maha out of the village and keep her son Mubarak safe while they wait to bring him to her. On page 240 Tamam, Maha’s mother-in-law goes into great detail of the plans to escape, and each woman’s role in helping Maha out. Again, I am so touched by the way the women look out for each other, disregarding all the trouble they themselves could get into. Instead of worrying about their husbands finding out they helped a woman escape, or fretting about how they may be disgracing themselves by assisting a “criminal,” the women of Hamia work so hard to help Maha get out of her disastrous situation.
The disastrous situation only gets worse when, after successfully hiding in the mountains for a little bit, Maha comes back to the village in desperate need of her son. She confidently walks up to the men standing in her front yard and her final downfall begins. After a short verbal fight between Maha and Daffash ensues, Daffash becomes so livid that he actually grabs Maha by the neck and the two start physically beating on each other. While the men stand and watch the brawl, the women of Qasim jump into the mess and try to save Maha; the description is as follows, “A closing-in noise. Hamda’s body being flung on the ground. Nasra standing there without hands. Halimeh struggling, a hand blocking my voice. Tears, piercing pain stinging in my shoulders (218).” Each woman struggles to fight Daffash off as the men simply stand around as spectators. These women are willing to risk physical pain for their friend, ally, and sister, Maha. I find that the lengths this group of women are willing to go through completely extraordinary! They comfort and act as nurse to Maha when she is hurt, they help her figure out how to escape a horrible situation, and they even throw themselves into a fight to save her!
Liyana Badr’s novel, A Balcony over the Fakihani captures the presence of women’s solidarity in Lebanon but much like Pillars of Salt it showcases much of the solidarity through female mourning. Political turmoil between the Palestinian Liberation Organization and the Israeli government caused much fighting, death, sorrow, and uncertainty for those living in Beirut, Lebanon then and even now.
Our main character of the first of the three novellas is Yusra who is married to Ahmed, a learned Palestinian who joins the resistance. When Yusra is three months pregnant with their child, Ahmed is killed by a plane attack in Southern Lebanon. Naturally, any woman, especially a newly wed would be devastated by her husband’s death, and Yusra is. This is where the women in Yusra’s life come into play. Despite the fact that Yusra is three months pregnant, she is so stricken with grief that she refuses to eat, drink, or even get out of bed! Her mother and “the women” come to Yusra’s aid when, “Faintness took hold of her from time to time, and the women would come to her, bringing rose water, and eau de cologne, massaging her temples and her flushed face (Badr 25).” An important aspect of women’s solidarity in the Arab world is the fact that these groups of women also act as doctors for each other. Whether they are psychologists listening to their friends and offering help, or creating medicines and remedies for sickness, or even promoting and instructing one towards good health during pregnancy. The notion of healing each other and promoting each other’s health is very prevalent among women. From any of these novels we do not see men caring for their wives or even each other. It is the women who offer the wisdom and knowledge to remedy one’s sickness. Trying so hard to take care of Yusra in her period of shock and mourning, “[The women] brought her orange-juice, but she refused to drink a drop. They pleaded with her, loving and insistent: ‘Yusra, you’re going to have a child.’(25).” These women take it upon themselves and feel it their inherent female duty to care for one another. Outside of these books, it is indeed a fact that women create most of the medicines like creams, concoctions, and cures, yet it is the men that sell and distribute them.
The second novella in the book, also named A Balcony over the Fakihani, also takes place in Beirut. It is somewhat a continuation of the former story but completely independent on its own. In this novella, our main female character’s name is Su’ad and her husband’s name is ‘Umar. ‘Umar and Su’ad, both in the PLO moved to Beirut soon after marriage. Although between Su’ad and ‘Umar is long and intricate, the novella only exposes the solidarity of women through the relationship of Su’ad and her best friend, Jinan. While sitting at home everyday as ‘Umar goes to work, Jinan and Su’ad spend all day together talking and bonding. In the Arab world, the case was often that the men went out to work everyday while the women stayed home and took care of the children or kept the house. This time allows women all the freedom of speaking, laughing, and enjoying themselves together. We will soon see how Su’ad and Jinan’s bond shows itself in time of need.
Su’ad’s husband, Umar, has been gone for a long time recovering in a hospital far away, and a year after he comes home, he is killed in an Israeli plane attack. In an almost identical scene to the former story where Yusra suffers from the grief of her husband’s death, so does Su’ad. Before I get to Su’ad’s grief, I would like to explain Jinan’s role within the whole situation and how that exemplifies women’s solidarity in this case. First of all, Jinan has her own chapter in the novella, where she recounts details of her and her best friend’s life, and how much time they spend together. The most important role Jinan plays as a fellow woman, sympathizer, and confidant is that she makes the decision to tell Su’ad her husband is dead. Jinan struggles with the decision thinking, “How could I tell her? The other girls gathered round me. Let’s go to her, they said (77).” One may think, maybe a soldier, officer, or one of ‘Umar’s friends would inform Su’ad of her husband’s death. But instead, it is Jinan, Su’ad’s closest companion and most trusted friend.
Of the five books we read over the semester, Dreams of Trespass, by Fatima Mernissi was definitely my favorite. Maybe it was because of the wild antics of some of the women on the farm, for example, my favorite character Tamou, who arrived at Mernissi’s grandfather’s farm as a strong “Riffan and a war heroine (Mernissi 54)” who rode her Spanish horse around to gather food save her people. Maybe it was because of the vivid, yet childish descriptions of the complex relationships of the characters within the story, or the descriptions of the characteristics of complex characters in the story. Lastly, I think it may be that the entire book centers itself on harems and hudud, frontiers, and shows that women’s solidarity is the fundamental element holding these harems together.
Despite the fact that there are two polar opposite harems in Dreams of Trespass, one with physical walls and one without, the women of these harems use their solidarity to explore and express their dreams of freedom. The harem in Morocco which is surrounded by walls is a much more limiting harem to the women within. Fatima’s mother, cousin Chama, and Aunt Habiba all make it a point to voice their negative opinions regarding their suffocating lifestyle. They do, however find freedom within each other. Everyday the women of the harem come together and discuss their problems or simply gossip. Mernissi actually writes an entire chapter on the practice of storytelling in the harem. Storytelling in Mernissi’s harem is more than just a way to pass the time. It is a way for the women to express themselves and their frustrations through theater. With the help of all the female family members and some of the children, Chama produces fantastic plays signifying female power and desires. When the women come together to act out the plays, they are able to release the pent up frustration of being held in a harem.
Another way to express their individuality and desire for freedom is through embroidery. Although it is “primarily a solitary endeavor (153)” some women band together and start a new way of stitching embroidery. Mernissi’s mother and Chama discard the traditional ‘taqlidi and create modern designs ‘asri (205).” The traditional embroidery was usually expressed by a demure bird with very intricate stitches, the rebellious women who opted for a modern version stitched birds with wings spread using quick, loose stitches. The significance of this disagreement is that each group of women was able to go through with their choice of design because she has a companion to stand together with. The women use their solidarity as grounds for sticking up for what they believe in, even if it does go against age-old tradition, as long as they have another right next to them, they at least feel like they can express themselves.
The women of the harems are sometimes divided upon certain issues and traditions, but for many occasions, practices, and celebrations, they come together as a whole, a group of undivided women. The most heartfelt expression of the women’s solidarity in Lalla Yasmina’s harem, the harem in the countryside, is exposed when the wives come together to cheer up a homesick wife. One would think that having six or so other wives to share with one husband would make all the women enemies. The truth is quite the contrary. In Yasmina’s harem all of the wives are generally friends and love each other dearly. One of the co-wives, Yaya, is from Sudan and quite a foreigner at Grandfather Tazi’s farm. In a great effort to make Yaya feel warm, welcomed, happier, and more at home, two co-wives, Yasmina and Tamou, go to great lengths to obtain a banana tree for Yaya to cultivate and remind her of home. At length the wives come upon a banana tree and present it to Yaya, “Yaya was so excited to see it that she took care of it as if it were a child, rushing to cover it with a large white sheet every time the cold wind blew (55).” The sincere compassion the women have towards each other trumps any indication of rivalry. The co-wife system is not a competition, but a nest of women’s solidarity.
Again the women convene to create innovative and fun ways to perform their daily chores. In chapter eight the wives start washing the dishes together in a river. Each wife has a specific task in the river and performs it gleefully. With the exception of Lalla Thor, the head wife, all of the wives love coming together and having fun with new chores. In Grandfather Tazi’s harem, the women do not bond together as a way to express their desires for freedom. The lack of walls around their harem provides them with ample opportunity to run around as they like. Instead, their solidarity is based on deep, genuine love and compassion. All the women respect each other as equals and are able to accept the fact that they all share the same husband. To the harem wives, each co-wife as I said before, is another friend with whom you can enjoy yourself with everyday.
Back in the Fez harem, women come together for more than expressing strong opinions. Though they may be divided between tradition or modernism, every woman agrees that beauty is an extremely important part of a woman’s life. When preparing for the weekly trip to the hamam, the women gather in the middle of the courtyard to smather their faces with creams and dye their hair with henna. Women who normally butt heads, like Lalla Mani and Fatima’s mother, join together to rejoice in the extravagance of beauty techniques. As I have read from more and more Arab literature I have found a common obsession with natural beauty and skin care among Arab women. The carefully concocted potions and lotions are so important to Arab women. One may discard it as frivolous or unnecessary, but to these women, their beauty is an important asset. If we analyze it, we may understand that Arab women have hardly any control over many aspects of their life, for a perfect example, whether they can choose to live in a harem or not, but they may kick their husbands out of the harem for a whole day to pamper themselves in preparation for the weekly bath. To follow up on such a notion, I would like to further point out a quote from Mernissi’s mother regarding her beauty products:
“If men are going to rob me of the only things I still control –my own cosmetics- then they will be the ones who have power over my beauty. I will never allow such a thing to happen. I create my own magic, and I am not relinquishing my henna (233).”
This quote is especially telling of the sentiments of the women in the harem, and many women for that matter, because it is an issue which they can possess control. In possessing that control, they also bond together, feeling victorious as women for achieving a freedom and power they otherwise are bereft of in their lives. The cosmetics that they create with their own recipes not only signify their wisdom and feminine knowledge, but also their independence from male dominance and control.
Regarding the beauty rituals and feminine practices, Fatima Mernissi comes to realize what it is to be a woman in the Arab world at a young age. To her it is forfeiting her close companionship with her cousin Samir and trading that relationship with the more sought after relationship with the other women of the house. On page 185 Mernissi contemplates the pros and con’s of each relationship and decides to go with the women. Although she no longer runs around with Samir or has him stand up and defend her to the grown ups, she now partakes in the womanly activities women partake in. Mernissi revels in the process of applying beauty products and prepping herself for the hamam. We understand that at a young age, girls realize the importance of women’s solidarity and opt to become part of the female circle as soon as they can. As I just mentioned, relinquishing her childish games with her cousin was Fatima’s sacrifice to become part of the womanly group. For many other girls, I would like to assume the transition is quite similar and hopefully just as rewarding.
The final and most compelling instance of solidarity expressed in the Fez harem comes in the form of the story of Princess Budur from A Thousand and One Nights. The women clamor and beg to hear the story told over and over for reasons more important than entertainment. The story itself is a manifestation of the solidarity women share and how it trumps any other allegiance or political restriction. The story goes like this: Princess Budur and her husband, Qamar al-Zaman take a trip, and on the third day in the camp, Budur’s husband is missing. She is so perplexed and fears for her safety so she dons his clothing and pretends to be him for the time being. Upon arriving in the City of Ebony, Budur’s beautiful disguise as a man captures the King’s attention and he decides to marry his daughter off to the pseudo- Qamar al-Zaman! Burdur’s predicament leaves her in a tight spot and she has to choose between two decisions to get out: first tell the king that she is actually a woman and risk being beheaded, or secondly, confide in Princess Hayat and hope that she will side with her out of love and respect for her fellow woman. Well, “Princess Budur did choose women’s solidarity, and it proved to be a very good choice, and one that demonstrated that women were capable of grand and noble sentiments towards one another (142).” Princess Hayat managed to save Budur, which, as the previous quote clearly states, shows how strong women’s solidarity actually is. A female stranger and highly influential woman saved another woman because of the natural bond between the two. I find this story to reflect the essence of women’s solidarity in general, but also to reflect the women’s solidarity in harems as well. There is a reason the women in Fez love the Princess Budur story, and because of that, they act it out repeatedly, marveling at how strong and loyal members of their female race truly are.
The unfortunate disconnect between a husband and a wife seems to be epitomized in the story of Ihsan and Nadia in A Woman of Five Seasons. Like many Palestinians, Ihsan fled to the southeast part of the Arabian Peninsula, in the story the country is named Barqais, after the discovery of oil. The luxurious life appealed to Ihsan and he brought his wife Nadia with him. From Nadia’s descriptions and attitudes toward Ihsan, we can infer that their relationship is dead and never really flourished in the first place. What I would like to talk about is the strong role of women’s solidarity in this book, but unfortunately Nadia is only a bystander and witness to the solidarity, for she chooses to stay on her own. She does however point out the unfortunate presence of the solidarity because she realizes many women are unhappy in their marriages. Nadia makes a solid distinction between men and women when she says,
“Men have their world, and women too have their own, restricted world. There they’ll sit, waiting for their husbands to return from their work or pleasures. Then in comes the man, heavy with fatigue, his waiting wife eaten up with longing. He’s a man who vents an urge, while she’s a woman looking for talk and tender affection, which she finds only with women like herself. The years pass, and he’s still a man, and she’s still a woman (al-Atrash 41)”
Nadia’s description gives us the image of the meek and devoted wife whose husband does not satisfy her emotional and affectionate needs. Through other women, she is able to express her emotions and hopes for affection. We understand that there is and maybe always will be a definite divide between men and women. They are completely different species and require different needs. I think it is funny to simply accept this difference and not demand compromise, but then again, I am speaking about relationships in the Middle East, rooted in tradition and male dominance. Much like the women in Balcony over the Fakihani and Dreams of Trespass, yet more modern and sophisticated, the women in A Woman of Five Seasons truly need their female counterparts to survive in the superficial, emotionally barren world of Barqais.
At the same scene, al-Atrash exposes us to the rich, pampered women of Barquis who curse Najwa Thabit for asking them to give more money to the Palestinian cause. Pages 40 and 41 go into detail about the excessively luxurious lives the Barquisi women lead, but the empty lives they lead as well. To make themselves feel better, the women cling to each other and bolster their confidences. Although it is a sad sense of solidarity, it is undeniably a strong sense of solidarity.
On the other hand, Nadia opts to stay completely disconnected with the other women of Barquis and practically lives an empty life. Who does she have to express her true feelings and desires to? No one really. Nadia continues to refer to the woman trapped inside her, keeping her thoughts to herself. There is a complete lack of women’s solidarity in Nadia’s life until she meets Jessica and immediately forms a strong bond with her. Nadia’s relationship with Jessica flourishes and the two actually start a business together. We can see that from the point of this relationship on, Nadia gains more control of herself and shows her happiness. Maybe she needed a true companion, maybe she just needed a female friend to make her feel whole. In any case, we can notice that Nadia’s relationship with Jessica is definitely a positive addition to Nadia’s life. Women’s solidarity is not something that is expendable, it is a completely necessary part of an Arab woman’s life, without it, we have seen that a woman is trapped and held captive by her own thoughts, ideas, and passions.
Ahdaf Soueif’s novel, In the Eye of the Sun explores the woman-to-woman relationship in the Arab world less than the other stories, but more on the luxurious yet disjointed life of its main character, Asya al-Mursi. Asya’s friends and family often call her spoiled and unrealistic in her dreams to make the real-world work out like a fictional story. Personally, I agree with her family and friends’ claims, but I have also come to realize that Asya’s life, unlike the other women’s lives in the other stories, is very much non-Arab. So when it is obvious to me that Asya lives such a Western life, it is much easier to understand her personal lack of female solidarity. On the other hand, Asya’s female friends, Chrissie, Mimi, and Noora all possess a greater sense of female solidarity, more rooted in traditional Arab culture.
Despite Asya’s very Western life, she does of course confide in and depend on the relationship between her and her best friend, Chrissie al-Tarabulsi and vice versa. Towards the beginning of the novel, Chrissie’s brother, Taha, sees her walking along the street with her classmate who happens to be a male. Pages 112-121 go into great detail about how Chrissie, according to her brother and father, has shamed the family name. Traditionally in the Arab world, women are highly forbidden to have contact with males alone in public, and if they do, they are committing a humiliating and shameful act. Chrissie’s case is no exception and when her father finally returns home, all hell breaks loose. What stands out to me is the fact that Asya actually intercedes in the argument and tries to protect her Chrissie. The loving, strong relationship the two girls share leaves Asya desperately trying to save Chrissie’s dignity and protect her from the wrath of her father. Asya’s attempts hardly make a difference upon Chrissie’s father, but in any case, she tried to help Chrissie as much as she could.
Because women cannot interact with men as freely as they can with each other, it is obvious why they should find comfort in each other. Mimi, Noora, Chrissie, and Asya meet often and talk about their social and personal lives, much like any other group of girls anywhere in the world. The difference with these young women lays in the restrictions their society places on their relationships. In the earlier interaction between Chrissie and her family, Chrissie is chastised for walking down the street with a man. With such societal limits, women are forced to stay close to each other because they are forbidden to open up or be close with any men. When the girls do happen to spend time with other young men, they have to make excuses for the situation or in Asya’s case, hide the young man they are with. In actuality, it is completely reasonable and unavoidable for women to have strong relationships as opposed to relationships with men because it is unnatural and looked down upon in their society to have contact with men.
Later in life, Asya and Chrissie continue to confide in each other, albeit they are on two completely different wavelengths. Chrissie loves children, married life (for the most part, until her husband, Fuad, marries another woman), and everything that is domestic. Asya hates the fact that she becomes pregnant, cheats on her husband, and never really settles down. Throughout the process though each woman shares her life’s problems and fears with the other. The entire novel is chronicled by the letters Asya and Chrissie exchange, each telling her sorrows and joys in life.
I would like to reiterate the lack of women’s solidarity in Soueif’s novel and as I said before, I believe it is because of the Westernized culture Asya al-Mursi embroils herself in. In the story, Asya actually avoids other Arabs during her travels and reluctantly interacts with them when she must. I think Asya’s minimal reliance on other woman is indicative of her personal issues and immaturity. She, unlike most Arab women, hardly holds a strong relationship with her own mother, and only really opens up to her when she is much older and fighting with her husband, Saif. Twice in the novel, Asya seeks advice and refuge in her mother regarding her marriage but only when it becomes too hard for her to handle. Rather than approach this as actual solidarity, I think Asya’s request for motherly help is out of desperation. Therefore, I conclude that Ahdaf Soueif had no intention of portraying Arab women as they traditionally are, but rather portray women who are geographically Arab, but more Westernized in thoughts and actions.
Another point I found interesting and in stark opposition to the universal women’s solidarity notion in these novels, is the presence of a division between the older women and the younger women in families. Generally, I have noticed that the older, more traditional women chastise and make trouble for the younger women. Maha’s mother in law, Aunt Tamam immediately nags Maha for not becoming pregnant in the beginning of her marriage. In the Middle East, a woman is supposed to become pregnant soon after marriage, and unfortunately for poor Maha, she did not. Tamam makes snide comment after comment reproaching Maha for her barrenness until she finally drags the poor girl to the “witch-doctor” Hulala to have her belly cauterized and make her fertile. Maha accepts all of Tamam’s complaints and even endures the harshest of pains to become pregnant.
Again, in Dreams of Trespass we see the older women looking down upon and disagreeing with younger women when we analyze Lalla Mani’s attitude toward the Fatima’s mother and cousins. Sided with Lalla Mani is Chama’s mother Lalla Radia and together the two make their wiser disdain for the younger women obviously known. Lalla Radia discourages Chama’s plays and Lalla Mani often scolds the children for having wet feet or Mernissi’s young mother for chasing her husband around with face cream on. My analysis on this relationship is that it must be another cultural standard. Once a woman leaves the younger matronly stage, she enters the older, grandmotherly matronly stage. The Arab women we read about are deeply rooted in tradition and usually repeat the teachings and treatment they experienced as young women to the next generation. When the older women could not conceive early in marriage, their mothers-in-law may have pushed them to have their bellies cauterized, and thus the cycle repeats itself. That said, the notion of the “older generation” in American is a bit similar, but not similar to the Arab extent where tradition is a strong foundation and should never be strayed from. In America, I have certainly witnessed chastisement from older generations for one’s more modern style or manner, but not the degree that I have read about. This may possibly be untrue for many cases in the Middle East, but the fact that in Pillars of Salt and Dreams of Trespass, older women have talked down to their younger counterparts is an important indication of how powerful tradition is to those living in the Middle East.
Reading these five novels has really opened my eyes and further exposed me to the culture, history, and politics of the Middle East. Last semester I had taken a history class on the Rise of Islam to the Ottomans, but as a history class I did not get a sense of Arab culture. Through the novels, I could read about life in Lebanon during the Israel-Palestine conflict, or feel the way a woman feels as she yearns to live outside her harem walls, or even experience the labor one solitary woman puts forth while nurturing her garden. Each story exhibits a certain Arab flair that one cannot even know about in the Western world. Through the stories of these women, I came to a greater understanding of the importance of women in Arab culture. Sure, an Arab woman’s role is hardly ever made to seem important in our Western view, but after learning more about it, I have come to realize a woman in an Arab family is the glue that holds her family together. Arab women are extremely important in maintaining the fluidity of the household, taking care of children, and providing every household need for the family. It is her sole duty to make sure her family life runs smoothly and everyone is well taken care of. Unlike many Western women today, Arab women still value the family system of togetherness and work hard to maintain it.
The solidarity of women, as I have discussed throughout this entire paper, is a phenomenon I have never really come across except in these Arab novels. It is astounding to me how strongly each woman clings to her female counterpart or rather group of counterparts for a variety of reasons. The underlying theme I have come to realize is that women in the Arab world need a release from the limiting structure of their society, and find this as a common factor in other women’s feelings. Gathering together to make a difference or just engage in a sort of “group therapy” allows the women to be who they are in a place where they may not be able to express who they truly are.
Women in the Western world certainly do bond and share solidarity, but unlike Arab women, they lack the understanding of how deeply and to what extent that it is such a hallmark of the culture. I believe Western women do not depend on their relationships with other women as strongly as their Arab counterparts do. In general, Western women can in no way relate to Arab women and often find it hard to find a common ground on issues. Since the beginning of Western civilization, Western women have basked in societal freedoms completely different than those in the Arab world. This female disconnect stems from the obvious geographical schism, but also from the polar opposite traditional values each hold. I think that in the Middle East, female solidarity is deeply rooted in tradition and culture. Arab women rely on their female counterparts for reasons Western women have no reason to.
As a Western woman interested in the Arab world, I love reading Arab literature, and soaking up as much information as I can about such complex societal issues and relationships in the Middle East. To me living in a society so remarkably different from that of the Arab world is fascinating and learning just this little bit more has further catalyzed my interest. I think reading novels that open Westerners’ eyes to Arab culture is as necessary as learning about European culture and Asian culture. As the world grows more and more cosmopolitan, so should our global cultural awareness and education.



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